Friday, February 27, 2009

Intra-squad rivalry

Austin (Texas) Facial Hair Club MVP and Beard Team USA member Bryan Nelson, who sports a bright red Texas-sized beard, is on a mission to dethrone full-beard-natural world champ and BTUSA teammate Jack Passion in Anchorage this May. It seems Jack (known to his fans as "the Pash") had the audacity to suggest that his own beard might be better than that of Texas' patron saint Billy Gibbons from ZZ Top. The AFHC and Bryan consider the honor of the Lone Star State at stake. Meanwhile 2003 FBN world champ and BTUSA member David Traver, who is a founder of the South Central Alaska Beard Club, host of the WBMC 09, reminds everyone that in Alaska "Texas-sized" means "small." Game on!


At February 27, 2009 3:39 PM, Blogger micah said...

kick his ass, seabass! I'm rooting for TX as I might be moving there in August.

Micah Vandegrift
President, Florida State University Beard Club

At February 28, 2009 3:29 AM, Blogger Dobbs said...

Bryan/Jack/David/and Phil if you're listening ...

Really looking forward to groovin' with ya' all in Alaska.

Carry on with your 'intra country rivalry' battle for 2nd place. I suppose you've gotta do something to try to keep the hope alive.

Sorry guys but Canada is poised and confident to challenge for first place. In Canada, shaving is for beavers only. Look out BTUSA - we're comn'n to beat you.

The gaunlet has been thrown.


At February 28, 2009 4:20 PM, Blogger Phil Olsen said...

We're listening, Darrell. So far we haven't heard anything that scares us.

At March 01, 2009 2:48 AM, Blogger Dobbs said...

Phil and guys,

Only David and Alaska stand in Candada's way. It is all about where you are on the planet. It's about latitude. Look at the anminals. Nearly naked dogs etc. near your Mexican border, and thick furred Polar Bears in the Arctic. And the ancient Wooly Mammoth? Need I say more?

With each degree of lattitude towards the North, beard prevalence and superiority increase. When a baby boy is born in the lower 48, the first observation is whether he has hair on his head. North of the 49th parallel, when a baby boy is born, the doctor exclaims: "cool beard" and the nurse scurries off for a brush. A kid with abeard- normal in Canada. What happens way up in Alaska is truly scary to think about.

Lower 48 competitors - are you trembing yet? Why don't you simply concede. Admit that your your weak, lower lattitude beards don't stand a chance.


At March 01, 2009 11:00 PM, Anonymous Dave Grams (WPBMA) said...

dont forget about the east coast. We are coming with fury. Mantooth and myself are worthy competitors that are here for some serious buisness we would like to let everyone know that the east coast is going gold

At March 17, 2009 2:31 PM, Blogger barbarossa said...

I was up in Canada for a few weeks last year and I didn't see any beards worthy of mention. Maybe they were hiding, or perhaps lost in the shadow created by my own beard. Nonetheless I look forward to witnessing many nations of beards in Alaska! -Bryan, AFHC

At April 11, 2009 6:41 PM, Anonymous SBC said...

Alaska has it...

At May 09, 2009 2:49 PM, Anonymous T B M C said...

have you guys ever been face to face with a grizzly bear? Keep in mind it's one loose in Tennessee moving north to Alaska in May!

At July 12, 2009 10:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

the beard is so long and it is in brown colour


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At December 03, 2011 9:19 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

All beards come second to Billy Gibbons. Doesn't matter how big of a beard you have.

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